Monday, December 21, 2009

Philosophical musings on play modes

Two playsessions with Mondage since I posted last. Here's a summary, as well as some musings of my own:

Last Tuesday: Impulse play session with Mondage. Did some public playing, which didn't give either of us much satisfaction. Then after dark we drove just into the woods close to town, where I tied him to trees. It was about -6 degrees C, so both of us had aloth of clothes on and such. But having Mondage standing upright, tied to two trees, it was still obvious that it turned him on. More than I thought it would, actually. We were quite close to the road, so people passed us quite regularly, which for me made the whole thing extra thrilling. After a while, I pulled down his pants, having him stand with his lower body nude while his upper body was fully dressed. I liked the contrasting image, and wish I'd brought a camera. (Note to self: Do this again sometime, preferable in daylight and a bit further away from civilization.) I eventually had him jerk off while standing upright, a new experience for him. As I suspected, he got quite weak in the knees afterwards, but luckily his legs and one arm was still tied securely in place.

This Friday: One-evening long BDSM Chistmas party. Played around with Mondage, tying him to the furniture, himself and other people. At one point, I hogtied him and shoved him under the table. I also gave him a light whipping with a flogger made of licorice strings (we've named it "kinkorice"). We ended the evening in a private room where I eventually won the Opposed Will Roll, and he came. (When is he going to truly learn that I'm the one in charge? It's not like he's ever actually won!)

I noticed that he does indeed respond better to bondage when he's focusing on me and what's being done to him. In other words: When he's concious on his role as a submissive and my role as the one in charge. He's still turned on by light bondage that he can wear while socializing, but the desired sub/Dom mood where I'm the main focus of his world seems to make him hornier. As oposed to previous play sessions, getting that mood took actual work, and retaining that focus for more than a few minutes was tricky. Probably because there were alot of people around, distracting us both. Once we left the people behind and started playing in a more private room, getting and retaining the desired focus was much easier.

I realise that a divide has grown up between random, light, non-comitting bondage and the more serious bondage/BDSM playing. For me and Mondage, I don't think there was such a divide in the past. I cearly remember when both those "genras" of playing were basically the same thing. That really isn't the case anymore. I don't concider this a bad thing at all, I'm just remarquing upon it because I find the developpement interesting. We're really comming to discover more of his submissive traits, and I feel that I fit more comfortably into the role of the Dominant than I did a few months ago. As I relax into the role, I'm also turned more on by it.

I think a balance between light, "social" bondage and more focused bondage/BDSM play is the ideal. I wouldn't forgo either, as both have their funtions. Now that I'm more aware of this divide, I think it'll be easier for us to switch between these two modes as well. I know some tricks that'll take him into a sub-mode almost instantaniously, and if I just work at keeping him there, we should be able to play seriously in a social setting as well. It just takes more awareness of where we are, mentally, and where we want to be.

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Have you been naughty or nice?

Naughty is more fun, without any doubt! FetLife, which I've mentioned here before, are giving away over 200 very cool, very kinky presents. All you need is a profile on FetLife, and then you may pick out the three items that you want the most. Just follow the red banner at the top of the page, or go directly by this link: http://fetlife.com/sit_on_santas_lap

The gifts I've said I wanted the most are:
1. A bondage bag with ropes.
2. A big, lockable toy box (mostly because it's very usefull, and I'll probably never buy something like this on my own)
3. A nice whip

If you participated as well, what did you wish for? Post a comment and let me know!

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Sneak attack!

T has hinted towards us having sex at least two or three times in the last couple of weeks. I just haven't been in the mood at all, because my bachelor thesis has taken up all of my energy. I've masturbated a bit, to get relaxed enough to sleep, but sex has simply felt like too much work. This is stupid, I know, because it's possible to have sex very quickly and with very little hassle. I just haven't been in that mode at all.

But yesterday, I finished and handed in my thesis.

I went to bed very early last night, and so woke up today feeling uncommonly awake and in high spirits. My boyfriend was sleepy, but I felt this could be a good oportunity for sex. I carefully played with his dick for a while, as he was only half-awake. When he woke up a bit more, I sucked and licked it for a while, before lubing myself up and putting him inside of me. Wasn't really in a mood to orgasm, myself, but rode him (backwards, with my legs between his, like I've tried to explain before) until he came. It was a nice way to start the day.

Calm and trusting

Last Friday and Saturday, I played with Mondage again. Friday wasn't planned, we just happened to be going to the same event, and I took the chance offered to me. He's been talking about public bondage, public gaging etc. So while driving, I made him wear a ball gag (which I hid with a scarf). He kinda freaked out a little, but I think he'll start to enjoy it if he gets used to it. So I'll definitly do something similar to him at another time. This same evening, I also tied his wrists together and had him walk around in public with that. Fun, and also something I'll probably do to him again. Still... The gaging was better!

Saturday we played like we've done before. Only truly new thing I did was put him over my lap while spanking him. I also tied him to himself while lying there. It was fun and it gave me alot of controll over his body and alowed me to reach most of his body at once. I also tried a tiny bit of falaka (foot torture), but not much.

To me, what really defined this day, happened earlier. While sitting in the couch with him, I did some breath controll. I tend to hold him for 20-40 seconds, sometimes pushing him to 50 seconds if I feel he can take it. He was really relaxed, really trusting and it was simply a great time. I wanted to really see that trust displayed, so I told him to look into my eyes while I kept his nose and mouth closed. And he did. He didn't struggle, make noises, look scared or anything. So I kept holding him... For one whole minute! That was just incredible! Not really the length, because holding your breath for a minute isn't THAT hard... But the fact that he trusts me so much, enough to trust that I'll let him breathe when I want him to. He didn't even seem impatient for it, nor scared, just calm and trusting. The connection betwen us just feels wonderful. I didn't think I'd ever get to such a point with him, and I'm just really pleased.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Mumification pictures

Pictures from last weekend's mumification.


Sunday, November 22, 2009

15 hours

Mondage met up at my place at 1pm yesterday. He left for home a little after 4am, 15 hours later. During those hours we played. Alot. Several different positions, and I suppose you can call it several different sessions.. In a way. There were food breaks, ofcourse, and we talked alot as well.. But it was still a very intensive day of playing, and I got really tired. Ofcourse, it was definitly worth it! :)

So what did we do? I'll have to do this chronologically, and see how much I remember..

1. Had him undress, then tied his legs so they were spread. Checked if he'd done his homework, which was to learn some anatomical terms, and be able to point them out on his body (simple stuff like "testes", "glans", "perineum" etc). This didn't turn him on, but I think it's important that he knows his own body well, so I didn't care.

2. Tied him in the fetal position and left him on a matrass for about 20 minutes. Covered him with a blanket so he wouldn't get cold. Used the ball gag trainer (like a "harness" for the head), the posture colar and alot of leather cuffs and chains.

3. Moved his arms around a bit, so he'd get better bood circulation, and started teasing him and playing with him while in a fetal-like position. Most of the time, he was sitting upright, meaning he had little or no balance and was depending on me for support. An excercise in trust. Re-tied him so he was lying flatter on his back when his butt started to fall asleep. Removed the gag. Kept up the teasing and petting and scratching and breath controll. We're baby-stepping towards a a regular sub/Dom-relationship, and I have the impression he's enjoying it. Told him he shouldn't come unless he'd asked (and recieved) my permishion, but revoked that ban after a while. So he came, though in the end he needed a hand free to be able to do it. Right after he came, I ordered him to taste his own cum. Which he did. I might pick up on that whole orgasm denial thing later on, because I find it alot of fun. It's yet another way of controlling him, "owning" him.

4. Dinner break.

5. Mumification. Roled him into a sheet, then tied him up with ropes from shoulders to ancles. Then roled him up in the thin matrass he was lying on. Left him there for about 20 minutes or so.

6. Released his hands and arms from the body-tie, and secured them over his head instead. Gaged him. Tortured him with tickling. The goal of this session was to get him down, mentally, to a place he probably hadn't been before. Into "sub-mode" in a way. And I did it! With a combination of heavy tickling and relaxation periods when I told him how good he was and how proud I was of him for being able to do it. I think the talking did more than the torture, but the torture was needed to get him mentally off balace for a short while so that the talking could do it's job.

After the first bout of tickling (which seriously wasn't much worse than tickling I've done on him before!) he started tearing up, by the second one he was sniffling and even after that he was able to take a third round. I know it was really hard on him, I could see him struggling, but he accepted it and he endured. As I'm sitting here, writing this, I'm again reminded of how proud I am of him for that! He absolutly hates being tickled, and yet he was able to accept it because I wanted him to. Not once, but three times! That's a gift I never thought anyone would give me, and as I'm writing this I can feel a lump in my throat because I'm so pleased with him. With us. We've come a long way since we first started playing, and I'm really looking forward to future sessions with him. I doubt I'll do anything like this to him in a long time, it's too taxing on both of us, but I think it was important to do it.

Afterwards, I untied him completely and we sat talking for a long time. He'd been down deep, emotionally, and it took some work to get him back up. I think I handled that part of it pretty well, too. I've been there, I've felt that same emotional emptyness, and I think having played the sub-role myself, I know better than many Doms what's needed.

7. We took a break, made panecakes and relaxed. It was past 1am before we finished.

8. Gaged him and tied him in a rather tight hogtie. Left him under a blanket, while I sat waching TV. He almost fell asleep in that position! I was feeling tired too, so I knew this part couldn't last long. Loosened his bonds a bit, to make his hands less cold and purple (a sign of poor blood flow, in case you were wondering), and started playing with him. The regular stuff, breath controll, scratching, nibbling etc. Concidered refusing him the right to come, but decided against it after a couple of minutes. We were both too tired for those kinds of games. So he was lying on his belly, in a hogtie, and while I was biting his ears and neck, and doing breath controll, he came again. Untied him, talked for a bit, let him clean up.

And then we talked some more, and some time after 4am he left. That was truly a long day! :D

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Another BDSM weekend/party

Another weekend-party is over, and I had a great time. T played with me, and I really loved it even though I was so tired I could barely stand. There was flogging, groping, petting and I spent some time sitting on the floor by his knee. I really like having him pay attention to me like that. He even enlisted help from M, a good friend of ours. She mainly had fun controlling the vibrating egg inside of me, and in the end she groped my boobs. She's really good at groping. *grins*

I also played with Mondage. In fact, we had two sessions spread over two evenings. On both occations I tied him to a table in the main area, partly because it was practical and partly so he'd get used to the idea of people waching him. He's got a fetish for (motorcycle-) helmets, so we used that in addition to gag and blindfold, which I think he appreciated. He doesn't have any good pictures of himself wearing a gag, so I took alot of photographs. I'm also quite pleased with the bondage I did on him. Note that the rope went between his toes at first, but it got too uncomfortable so I moved it to run around his foot. Not as cool, but I don't want to hurt the poor boy (at least not severely...). Without further addo, here are some pictures:




Monday, November 2, 2009

Self-taught bondage

I'm getting increasingly fascinated by bondage. Don't get me wrong, I've always enjoyed it to some extent, but I haven't taken the time to actually sit down and learn the techniques properly. I know a couple of neat things, and I tend to remember stuff I've seen done. But I don't own a single bondage book or DVD, and I don't want any either. They'd just lay around gathering dust.

But occationally, when I should be in bed but in stead am procratinating in front of the computer, I randomly teach myself some bondage. Last time, I ended up learning a neat technique that I later used on Mondage' arms (I've posted pictures of that previously). Tonight, I taught myself how to make a collar (or a bracelet etc) out of rope, based on this Youtube video. I saw the video once, saw the beginning once more, and then tried making the collar once. It was really easy, and it worked. I think it looks beautifull! Here are the pictures to prove it:

Sunday, November 1, 2009

And then there was sex

Had sex this morning. *grins* Just a quicky really. I masturbated and had an orgasm while T was in the bathroom. When he got back to bed, I sucked his cock for a while, and then we fucked. It was very uncomplicated and nice. And I enjoyed being able to solely focus on him and his pleasure, and not bother about my own. I'd like to do that again sometime.

Possessive

Played with Mondage yesterday. From about 1:30am to around 3:am. My boyfriend, T, was present most of the time. Afterwards, we sat talking until 5:30am. The talking was good. The talking is what's the most memerable about yesterday. We are really getting close to eachother now, close enough that I can ask him about the most intimate and private things and get honest answers from him. I still feel he's holding some things back from me, perhaps not intentionally, but we've come a very long way in just over a month.

One thing I've discovered is that I don't like the idea of him playing with others. I analyzed this feeling yesterday, because it's very unlike me. I don't get jealous. Ever. I think the main reason I get possessive is that I don't actually have any emotional hold on him. With boyfriends I can lean back on the fact that they love me. Mondages does (thankfully) not love me, and we don't even have an "ownership" thing going on. It isn't a traditional sub/Dom relationship. I don't "own" him, he owns himself. He's the one to decide whom he plays with, not I. And that's the way it should be. That is what scares me, I think... That's what makes me (in my head, not in my actions) possessive: I have no hold on him, no claim to him. He's very... Ephemeral. In the sense that he might disappear at any time, and I won't have any right to try and stop him.

So why get possessive about someone so ephemeral? Well, I won't deny that I'm slightly hooked on playing with him. BDSM-wise we're quite well-matched (at least better than me and Pet was), and we've had some great sessions together. Outside of the BDSM-scene, we have practically nothing in common what so ever, but it doesn't matter because the only time we hang out is when we play. It's purely for pleasure, both our pleasure, that we have anything to do with eachother. I enjoy it, and I'll admit I wouldn't enjoy loosing it. I think that's why my thoughts get slightly possessive.

I won't let my thoughts interfere with my actions, though. Like T just said: You either deal with it or you stop playing with him. The later isn't an option for me at this point, so ofcourse I'll go for the former. I deal with it, and don't let it fuck anything up. He still owns himself, and decides for himself whom he plays with. I won't get upset or insulted or anything by him choosing to play with someone else. That would just be stupid.

Sunday, October 25, 2009

My hobby

I played with Mondage yesterday for several hours. I keep pushing his boundaries, this time I managed to get him completely nude (ofcourse with permishion from T). I also did something I've wanted to do for ages: Tie him up and throw him in the shower. I don't know why this particular thing has had such an attraction to me, it's probably because of the power trip again. I mean, forcefully soaking someone while they're dressed isn't a daily occurence.

The BC ("breath controll", not "before christ", doh!), the tickling, the scratching, the biting and nibbling and licking. I spanked him quite a bit, taught him why some things hurt more than others (with the appropriate demonstrations). I won't go into all the details here, like I have before. It's getting to be more of a routine now, I know what I do and where I want to go with this. I have some long term plans, some short term plans and a head full of ideas for future play sessions.

What I wanted to talk about here are the long term effects this playing has on me: I felt it particularly well yesterday. I started the day being in a very bad mood, hormones fucking my body over because I'll be getting my period in a few days, feeling angry and upset for no reason what so ever. Having to work on Mondage, focusing on him and his reactions, doing to him whatever I feel like (within certain limits ofcourse)... And obviously becomming turned on myself, by his reactions as well as the power I was wielding in itself... It made me happy. Later that day, a friend commented on my mood. He said I seemed happy and content. And I was.

I've thought about it this week: Playing with him regularly has helped me become a more balanced person. By all means, I wouldn't call it life changing or anything. Nothing on that scale! But I can feel that these sessions do me good. It's like any hobby you imerge yourself in, I suppose. Some people go skiing, I tie and torture an innocent young man. It's my thing and I like it.

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Today

Car, surprise, unplanned, in daylight.

Crowded parkinglot.

Hat to blindfold, scarf to bind.
Sweaty, dirty, smelly, lovely.

Pain.
Pleasure.

Ecstasy,
at my comand.

Hooked. (Sucker)

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Another bondage pic



Thought I'd add the best picture from Friday's play session with Mondage. Later, we got the shirt off him, which looked imensly better. But ofcourse then I forgot to take pictures. So this is what I've got. It's somewhat uneven and would have looked better with all-black ropes in stead of a mix... But you use what you have available. It's a start at least, and I'm happy with how it turned out. I'm learning.

The picture says it all, click for link


I (heart) FetLife: BDSM & Fetish Community for Kinksters, by kinksters

Sunday, October 18, 2009

A new relationship

Stubby arrived yesterday, which was faster than I'd expected. However, I'm not complaining! I got to trie it out yesterday (funny, I want to say "him" in stead of "it"), and there is no doubt in my mind that it was worth the money. This is without doubt the best sex toy I've ever tried.

Not everything is perfect ofcourse. The "handle" is a bit too short for my taste and the controlls will take some time to get used to. And ocourse, the usual problem when I masturbate: My arms aren't long enough. I could use another inch or two, as well as an extra joint in the middle of my lower arm. But hey, you can't have everything. And science fiction aside, Stubby is a very, very good toy.

The design is just lovely, the toy looks great, has no smell and a great texture. It's just hard enough for my taste, and I find that I just want to sit touching it, petting and stroking it. That's a reaction no other fake dick has ever produced in me before. The vibrations are strong, REALLY strong. You get alot of shaking from those 4 AAA bateries, significantly more than I expected actually.

The most interesting thing, for me, was that with Stubby I don't need another toy on my clitoris. The "skirt" of the vibrator makes my entire pussy vibrate, and although it doesn't go all the way up to the clit the vibrations are so deep and strong that I don't need it. Yesterday's first orgasm was just incredible: I put it in, turned it on, fiddled with the controlls for a bit, found a strength I enjoyed, and came. I never even touched my clitoris at all, which I don't think has ever happened before! The second orgasm demanded more work from me. I tried adding another vibrator on the clit, but it just felt annoying. A disturbance, kinda. So I ended up just using my hand, which eventually made me come again.

I think I'll need some time to get really used to Stubby, we need to get to know eachother properly and such. But I can already feel that we'll probably develop a great and loving relationship.

Saturday, October 17, 2009

After the fact

So this is the report from the play session I told you about in my previous entry. It played out pretty much as planned, so I won't bother repeating all of it. I'm really pleased with my timing during the actual play. My sense of time tends to get a little crazy when I'm distracted like that, but this time we got through most of the "program" in little over an hour. Which was very much like I'd planned it. It gave me time to prepare the public play bondage in my own appartement, having him drive his car with decorative ropes on his arms and such.

One thing I didn't write up in my previous post, but which I had thought about doing some time soon, was have him jerk off while tied down. Previously, he's just come without any direct stimuli from either of us (just the ropes and him lying on his stommack). I wanted it done to further his trust in me and further habituating him to the fact that his sexual life might actually involve another person occationally. I didn't actually see his dick (his hands were in his boxer shorts) and I didn't do any of the touching, ofcourse. Basically, I hogtied him and got him really worked up. Then I turned him onto his back, and ordered him to masturbate until he came. He was blindfolded and gaged, but I kept touching his chest and head, doing breathcontroll and giving him the occational pinch. I refused to let him dream himself away to somewhere else and forget that I was there. I was partially expecting him to refuse all together, and I'm really proud of him for daring to do it. Being gaged and blindfolded probably helped, but if he'd wanted to protest he could have done so. I'd expected him to take alot longer in actually comming, as doing something like that in front of someone else isn't easy. In fact, he came rather quickly. Soon after I removed the gag, but left him tied up and with the blindfold on for a bit longer.

He only got to stay at the BDSM party for about an hour before he had to leave, and he had his arms tied behind him (like the picture I showed in my previous post, kinda) most of the time. About half the time he was gaged and blindfolded as well. I got to lead him around a bit, but not as much as I'd wanted. The lack of a colar is heartfelt. He's ordered a posture colar online (at my urging), but it isn't the most comfortable for long-time use. I might take him colar shopping at a local pet store some day soon.

All in all I'm very pleased with his progress. He's alot less tense when we're playing now, daring to trust me and do as I want him to do. There's probably some submissive tendencies in him somewhere, but up untill now they've just been overwhelmed by his fetish for bondage. When we aren't playing, he's also becomming more used to my presence and generally more trusting. He jokes alot, smiles more than he used to and just seems more at ease. All in all, I'm pleased to have him as my toy.

Friday, October 16, 2009

Planning a session

It's the evening before another play session with Mondage, and this is yet another entry I won't post until afterwards. I'm writing this now for you to get a view on how I plan stuff like this. Now, first of all this session will be special because we have very little time. Here's the preliminary scedual (I don't usually plan as detailed as this, but like I said: Limited time):

3pm: I show up at his place. We eat. I might start the teasing here already, touching him, grabbing him and holding him down. Perhaps wrestling a bit. We'll see.

5pm: By now we should have arrived at my place and started playing. We'll only have the time for one position, which will probably be the hogtie. I'm contemplating spreading his legs wide open, perhaps using an improvised spreader bar of some kind... Or just tying him to the table legs. We'll see. I'm also thinking I'll introduce some more real pain this session, probably by using a riding crop on his thighs. There will definitly be the usual teasing, nibbling, biting, scratching and breath control. Perhaps I'll use ice cubes some more. I hope I can make him come, though I won't have much time to do it.

7pm: By now we should be done, and preparing to go back to his place to dump the bondage gear and leave the car. We'll be going by buss to a BDSM party at a friend's place. Either in my appartement or in his, I'll have hopefully tied him into something like this. Once we're ready to leave his place, I'll tie his arms together in a tightened version of this. Then I'll dress him in his outer jacket, and we'll go catch a buss. I know he's been dreaming of public play, and this is a quite safe way to do it.

8pm/9pm: We'll be arriving at the party around now. I plan to keep playing with Mondage there for as long as I can. Among other things, I plan on blindfolding and gaging him (which I know he loves), as well as show off the bondage work I've done (assuming I've made it work at all). I might keep him on the floor, to be used as a foot rest, at least for a short while. I'm not sure, it depends on who else is there and what they're up to. Mondage will have to leave at 10pm.

So those are my plans for the evening, let's see how the day actually plays out. I'll keep you posted.

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Stubby in the mail

I just ordered a new toy. The one I was talking about a few days ago: Stubby 3G.

I did some research and discovered that ordering it in a Norwegian online store cost about the same as ordering it abroad. This is news to me, but I think it might be related to the fact that FunFactory is German (and not for example American). Well, buying it abroad might be a hint cheaper, but with the toll costs as well as the added waiting time before I get it, it isn't worth it at all. Several Norwegian online stores stock Stubby G3, but the cheapest one (when all additional costs were tallied) was Lek&Kos. They look kinda.. Cheap. So I'm a bit sceptical.. But they were almost 100NOK cheaper than the others, so I'm willing to give them a try.

It should be here early next week. I'll try it out and let you know what I think then. Before that, I'll probably write at least one other blog entry. You see, I have another session with Mondage comming up on Friday, something I'm really looking forward to.

Sunday, October 11, 2009

Bondage pictures

With his permishion, I'm here publishing two photos of Mondage. The first is some bondage work I did yesterday. It isn't flawless, you can see I did a couple of mistakes, but it's the first time I've tried that technique and it worked out quite well. The second is from the last time we played, in a friend's appartement after a BDSM organisation meeting. It's just a basic hogtie, not very pretty or anything, but it got the job done.




A nice way to start a day

T and I had sex today. The lazy, just-woken-up kind of sex. We used the reversed cowgirl/lying doggy again (me riding him backwards, but with his legs spread and me sitting between them, my calves underneath his thighs), though I still don't really know what to call that position. Any suggestions?

For the first time, I think, I actually had an orgasm while he was fucking me like that. And a good orgasm it was too. Slowly building, so slow in fact that I didn't think it would work out. But it did, and it was good. He came as well, just as I was about to come. Simultaneous orgasms aren't that common for us, though we've done it before several times. I like it. A nice way to start a day, I feel.

Saturday, October 10, 2009

A long day of bondage

After having talking about wanting to do it again for almost two weeks, Mondage and I (and T) finally found a day that was good for all of us. So today, while T was away, Mondage came to see me. He arrived at noon and left around 8:30pm. We played until 7pm, with about an hour's dinner break around 4:30. I'm writing this, just before midnight on the same day, but I won't post it until later. I've asked him to write about his experiences, and I don't want to influence his writing with my own thoughts. So I'll save this for now and post it some other day.

Technically (and chronologically), I can divide the day into three different bondage positions: First, I tied him to a chair. His clothes were still on, and I used it as a warm-up to what was to come later. I blindfolded him for a bit, but didn't gag him even though I knew he wanted me to. Late in this position, I started doing some light breath control. Then I untied him, and lay him on a thin madras on the floor, where I tied him into a hogtie. At this point, he wore nothing but his underwear. He started out with his legs together, and I changed it up after a while so that he had his legs apart. The we had a dinner break, and afterwards I tied him flat. His legs together, his arms down his side, really tight but quite comfortable as well (as I knew he was getting tired at this point). He started out on his back, and I moved him onto his stomach after a while. In this later phase, I did some very cool bondage work on his thighs. I'm quite proud of that, to be honest.

I used a combination of leather cuffs, chains and ropes. Two sets of cuffs for arms and legs gave me points to attach ropes on both wrist, upper arm, below the knee and at the ankle. It worked really well. I primarily used chains with snap-hooks (quick-release hooks) to attach the cuffs to one another, and then ropes to make it all tighter and tying down parts of the body not held tight by the cuffs. I had some fun with a plastic shoe horn from IKEA, but he isn't really into pain so it was mostly teasing and scaring. I also played around with ice cubes for a bit, which was great as he's very ticklish. We briefly tried hot candle wax, mostly for him to try what it was like. None of us found any great pleasure in that, so we quickly gave it up. He's got a big thing for gags, so some of the time he was gaged with a ball gag. I also tried gaging him using a wooden clothes' pin, which he absolutely hated. He was also blindfolded a lot of the time, by a so called "sleeping mask" (they hand them out to you at the night train in Norway, and they work great). 

Generally speaking, I'm very focused on the oral sides of sexual pleasure (and pain). For example, I love it when someone nibbles and sucks my ears and neck, and someone going down on me is just fantastic. This also translates to my own activity. I love going down on other people, and I generally love using my mouth for all kinds of things. Now, by the deal I've made with T, there would be no touching of bare genitalia (and my clothes stayed on all the time, so there was certainly no receiving either). But that didn't stop me from doing stuff with my mouth on other parts of Mondage' body. I bit, nibbled and licked his nipples, ears and neck, among other things. At one point I bit and pinched my way up his back, for example.

He's a big fan of breath control, so we experimented a bit with that. I held his mouth and nose closed with my hand. He wore a gag that blocked his mouth, and I closed his nose using my teeth. We also tried out some careful pressure on the throat, using hands, mouth/teeth, rope and chain. We both concluded that it felt a bit too risky, and besides he got more of a kick out of having his mouth/nose closed off. The longest we tried was 15 seconds, and I probably won't do much more than that in the future either. 15 felt really, really long. In fact, 10 seconds feels long. Most of the time, it was between 5 and 8 seconds, and that worked just fine. The point is the control (or lack of it, in his case), not the lack of breath.

He had two orgasms in just a few hours. Once in the hogtie, and once in the end when he was tied flat. It felt a bit like I'd won.. He tried so hard not to do it, and I tried to stimulate the rest of his body to such a degree that he couldn't hold it in. I won. He's so responsive, so easy to read. And he's quite easy to influence, teach, call it whatever you like. So young (which is odd since he's almost two years older than me). It's a matter of experience, I think. I keep smiling, whenever I think back on this day.

Of course, all this playing turned me on as well. After he'd left, I masturbated and had three orgasms. All in all, it was a great day.

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Toy shopping

So, last Saturday I went toy shopping. The egg I bought in London only works occasionally, the dolphin is made of a material which attracts dust and dirt (which I dislike, and besides I've had it for about 5 years now!) and the hard pink vibrator is getting worn as well. The Rock Chic has it's uses, but the vibrating is only on/off, so I don't use it that often. I had basically nothing left that I enjoyed using frequently.

I'd planned to invest in a vibrator from FunFactory, but couldn't decide on one. The small ones looks great but are... well.. small.. And the large ones look so freakishly large, I'm not sure I'll be able to use it much. And for that price, I want something that'll see frequent use. I dragged T to the shop today and showed him the large one that I prefered (which was the "Patchy Paul"). After surfing around online today and thinking about it, I've actually changed my mind: "Stubby" is my guy. Because, let's face it, I don't need a huge, long vibrator. I need something powerfull and propery curvey that will stimulate what I want stimulated. And I'm pretty sure Stubby can do that. It, he, excists with a 2G (2nd Generation) motor as well as a 3G motor. I think I'd prefer the 3G one, even though it's more expensive. I've read up on it, and besides the price difference isn't that huge. Not to mention that the 3G version excists in black! Hehe! In any case, I suspect it needs to be ordered online as I haven't seen G3 in any Norwegian stores yet.

What I did end up buying was a new egg, this one wireless. So far I'm pleased with it. I would have prefered simple vibrations in various intensities over all these programs, but you can't have everything. Two or three of the programs are ok. The rest are pretty useless. But it makes me come, and that's the most important part, really.

On impulse, I also bought a new ballgag (with breathing holes), because my old one broke a long time ago and I wanted a new one. Besides, it was really cheap.

Friday, October 2, 2009

Self-administered pain

A few days ago, I did something sexual that I've never done before. I hurt myself on purpose while masturbating, to push me into an orgasm. To be precise, I pinched my nipples until it started hurting a bit. Not much, but enough for it to be more than just touching. That this actually worked for me was rather surprising, as touching anything but my pussy while masturbating has never done anything special for me. Touching my arm and touching my nipples was much the same thing, and I just figured that's the way it was. When other people do it, it's something very different. I can't tickle myself either, I thought it was much the same thing. Turns out, pleasure doesn't do anything but pain does. I'll need to experiment with this some more...

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Increased frequency

This spring and summer, I haven't had much sex. I was pretty certain that would pass once both T and I got back to work/school, and got more routine into our daily lives again. And I was right.

Remember, we had sex last weekend? Well, we had sex today as well. Another round of weekend-morning-sex, which you know I love. It's a long time since we've had sex as often as once per week, and I really hope this trend will continue. Perhaps we'll be able to increase the frequency even more... I'd really like that!

T is really great with his fingers. I lay over his legs, touching and sucking his cock, while he stimulated my g-spot. After a while, I couldn't focus on his cock anymore, the stuff he did to me was just too good. We used some water based lube, which felt kinda odd after having used the silicone based for so long, but it worked like a charm. I'm not sore at all now, and it's just been a few hours. The orgasm I got from his fingers was really, really good.

Afterwards, we fucked, using that position we've discovered that doesn't strain T's back: Him lying on his back, propped up on some pillows. Me between his legs, my legs underneath his, like a mixture of a backwards cowgirl and a laying/sitting doggy style. Tricky to explain. While I "rode" him (not the right term, but I did most of the moving so it's somewhat appropriate), he used his thumb around my anus. Not inside, just applying some pressure and stimulation on the outside. It felt really, really good. That area is really sensitive. The best thing about this position was that I made him come. Usually, there isn't enough stimulation, as I can't get the tempo high enough. But today, it worked very well indeed. 

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Mondage in Bondage

Remember I said that my interest for the BDSM community was rising? Well, yesterday I made a big comeback in the BDSM organisation in my town. Yes, I've always been around, but I haven't really been active for months.

One of the guys in the organisation, who I'll name Mondage (because his name's on M, and he's into bondage), had written a fair bit about his fantasies on Fetlife, and I'd kept asking questions and trying to figure out what he enjoyed. I've played with him a bit before, but usually as someone else's assistant. But after all our conversation, I'd decided I wanted to take things a bit further. And I did.

It started out in the pub where we usually all meet up, me holding his hands so he couldn't move and such. Pretty innocent really, but I promised him he'd get more from me after we left. The after-party took place at another member's apartment nearby, as it's done several times before. From about 11:30pm until about 3:30am, I played with him. T was sitting in another couch most of the night, fondling various women and waching the show. First, I tied Mondage in a hogtie on the floor, one of the things he'd said he liked. He got gagged and blindfolded, another thing I know he loves. He's not that much into pain, and is terribly ticklish (in a not good way), but I gave him a few slaps with a paddle and generally had my way with him.

After about an hour and a half in various hogties, I untied most of the ropes on him. Not long after, as a way of "grounding" the both of us, I gave him a back rub. And you know my love for biting... Well, I just couldn't help myself, I started biting his neck and shoulders. It's probably the smell of a horny man that does it. Anyway, he's previously expressed a dislike for biting, he's simply too sensitive so it hurts too much. I was adamant to prove him wrong, forcing him to let me keep biting, nibbling and sucking on his ears, neck, shoulders and back. And what do you know? Even though he was complaining it hurt and he didn't like it, his hard on just got harder! Fascinated by this, I kept going. I considered it might just have been caused by the ropes on his wrists, making moving his arms very difficult. But the reactions I got truly varied with the intensity and placement of my nibbles.. I even tried out some very light breath control, something I've never tried before at all. It wasn't something I planned, it just seemed right. He hadn't expected to enjoy it either, but he truly did. A new fetish discovered, or so he told me afterwards.

At the end, I was biting, pinching, grabbing and raking his chest, stomach, nipples, neck and ears pretty roughly. Stuff no one had ever been able to do with him previously, he was suddenly enjoying tremendously. Whether it was pain, pleasure or a mixture of both, he couldn't tell. It was just intense sensations, and he was loving it. I couldn't do all the things I wanted to do with him, because we were after all sitting in another man's living room, with people on all sides. We eventually cooled things down, and I told him to go get dressed because I wouldn't be able to keep my hands off him otherwise. 

It was a wonderful feeling. I truly enjoy having my way with men, hurting them or pleasing them as I choose. And I love, love, love when I see a hard cock rising in his pants, knowing my actions caused it. In a way, that cock is mine. Or at least the pleasure he feels is something I have a kind of ownership to. It's hard to explain properly. And I enjoy giving BDSM-related experiences to the inexperienced, having sort of a tutor role. Again, it's a power thing I think.

Ah, that was truly a great night. I hope he'll let me do something like that to him some other time.

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Great weekend

This weekend was just lovely. It's been months since T and I have had a weekend consisting of two lazy mornings waking up together and not rushing off somewhere. We even went to bed at the same time the nights before, which doesn't happen often either. I just love sleeping until I'm rested, waking up bit by bit next to him, dozing with his arm around me or his legs wrapped around mine.

In view of this, it should come as no surprise that we had sex yesterday morning. I truly feel that morning sex in the weekend is the best sex there is. It's a combination of waking up together, being warm, rested and relaxed, and knowing that there's no need to hurry.

I love, love, love giving him blow jobs. I could almost (but just almost, mind you!) do without sex entirely, if I could just give him a blow job every so often. It's so intimate, so close and he smells so delicious. Oh, that smell, it's like a drug for me! Besides, I just love the feeling of having a guy's cock between my teeth; not only is it almost a sensory overload of goodness, but it's quite a power trip as well.

This information doesn't come out of the blue,  of course. The sex did end up with me giving him a great, long lasting, blow job. It was quite a bit of work, and I did end up using just my hand for the last few seconds, but it felt very satisfying for both of us. That's another power trip that I love: Having a guy come in my hands, knowing that I could stop it and take all that pleasure away from him if I wanted to. And of course it's a reaffirmation of my skills as a lover, which is quite a little confidence boost in itself.

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Going up!

My interest for BDSM, both the BDSM scene and the general practice of BDSM, has it's ups and downs. One cycle takes about three or four years, give or take half a year. Luckily, the low points last alot shorter than the high ones. I've had a very low point this past half year, but I feel I'm on my way up again now. This is partially due to a couple of new aquantances I've made these last couple of weeks, both of them Dominant males without much practical experience.

Something in me wants to take care of them, teach them and give the confidence. Not because I think there could be any permanent agreement between us, I've got a boyfriend already and besides I'm really just interested in single scenes. It's partially, like I said, because I'd like to help them. And partially because I'd like the thrill of a new person involved in my sexual life, a fresh outlook, new techniques and ideas. Not to mention I'd like to experience BDSM play to a greater extent (as in: more often) than I do these days. I don't think I'd fuck any of them, even if it was permitted, but one can do alot of fun BDSM stuff without it ever comming to sex.

These are interesting times, I'm looking forward to what the future will bring. :)

Friday, August 14, 2009

Yay, sex today!

We had sex today, me and T (my boyfriend). I can't remember the last time we had sex. Must have been sometime in late spring, before the summer break. Perhaps in May sometime? I really can't recall. Anyhow, the sex was good. Not extraordinary, but good. I came, he came, we were both sweaty and happy afterwards.

I almost don't masturbate these days either. Once a month perhaps.. I just don't have alot of sex drive these days. And so I haven't missed sex. I know this stuff goes up and down, so I'm not worried. I'll get it back. And then I'll fuck more.

Sunday, August 9, 2009

World Orgasm Day

August 8th is the World Orgasm Day, apparently. I wasn't aware of this, I read it in someone else's blog. However, a quick Google search showed that it was indeed correct (I found at least two other days as well, but I don't mind there being several.. ). I wasn't feeling particulary horny today. I generally haven't been feeling horny much these last few months. Don't know what's up, really. But it's the principle of the thing. It's the World Orgasm Day, so I will orgasm.

Monday, May 11, 2009

I'm not crazy

At least not at crazy as some people...

Read and weep: The 5 most baffing sex scenes in the history of fanfiction

I actually think numer 5, with Elrond and Picard, was the most horrifying... Though Indiana Jones and Tom Riddle (a young Voldemort) was also rather.. Mind breaking. *shivers*

Quotes from the article:
"Please pause here and take a moment to savor the thought of Hugo Weaving "nuzzling" someone. Really fix that image in your mind."

And for all you Harry Potter fans out there, I share your pain.. Try making ANY sense out of this sentence:
"They flew to the nearest Portkey and lingered there, licking vinegar-stained fingers and making excuses not to go home until Fred grabbed George's damp hand and held it over the half-chewed acorn."

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Sex during my period

When I was younger, sex during my period was an absolute no-no. The last few years, I changed my mind, but I'd never actually tried it. Until last night.

I use a menstrual cup during my periods, which make me cramp less and generally feel cleaner and more relaxed about it all. I think that was part of the reason why I decided sex would be ok. T and I have talked about doing it before, and concluded that we would both be ok with it. So I didn't feel concerned about him either. We warmed up watching more of the same Beck porn movie we started last time. Then I removed my cup and freshend up a bit, brought a towel and we went to the bed room. I didn't want him actually touching my pussy with fingers or tongue. I just didn't feel comfortable about that, and he didn't seem to feel the loss. So we fucked. I think we tried out three or four different positions, and I got a great orgasm while riding him.

I'm glad I used some lube, as relying on the blood to lube me wouldn't have worked. There was surprisingly little of it, even though it was the second day of my period (and thus the day with the heaviest flow). All in all, it wasn't much different from regular sex. I'm glad to have tried it and broken that "taboo", and might do it again. But I won't strive to do it at every opportunity.

Sunday, March 22, 2009

69

We (T and I) wached more Beck-porn. This time it was one about a magical viking horn that makes women horny. I greatly prefer the first one we wached, as this one has annoying background music and a sillier story. Ofcourse, we only made it to the third sex scene before we stopped and went to have sex ourselves, but then that was the whole point.

For the first time in ages (I think it's been over a year), T went down on me. We actually did a 69, with me on top. It enabled him to breathe (which is what's been stopping us previously), while still allowing me to relax my body. Giving me the chance to keep giving him a blow job at the same time, was definitly an added bonus. *grin*

The penetrating sex itself was also very nice. Even though I was dripping wet, I still applied some lube. Afterwards, I wasn't sore at all, so I'll call that a sucess. Our position of choice this time was me riding him. It was actually the very first position in which I got an orgasm with a partner, back when I started having sex, which is why that position is rather special to me. True to form, I got a very nice orgasm today as well.

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Fucking machine trouble

I haven't written here in quite some time, simply haven't had the time. What finally prompted me to write was the sex T and I had last night. It was really late, and he mentioned how me might have sex the next day. This.... inspired me. I was just supposed to touch and smell him a bit, but then of course I just had to give him a blow job. *grin* I love going down on a guy, especially him. Next thing I know, we're having sex on the couch. Turns out, it's a bit too narrow for comfort, so we moved into the bedroom. And then we fucked some more. It was very nice. As this was kind of a "quicky", not having a long foreplay or anything, I used some lube. As I'm not particularly sore today, I guess it worked.

There's really just been one noteworthy event since I last wrote, but that sure was noteworthy! In the middle of February, "my" BDSM organisation hosted another weekend-long party. I enjoyed myself tremendously. In fact, my butt was bruised for over a week afterwards. *grin* I just love the IKEA shoe horn called Omsorg (translats to "care"). After over half an hour or various spankings, I broke down and cried. That felt soooo good. It's been ages since I did that, and it gives me such a release. An emotional reset, so to speak.  

At the party, I also meant to try out a fucking machine that someone had brought. Turns out, I'm just too tight for it. Other women used it without problem, and the dildo attached wasn't THAT huge. I might have handled it with some more foreplay, but I wasn't in the mood for foreplay, I was in the mood for fucking. I masturbated first, and had an orgasm. That usually makes me relaxed and wet enough. With tons of lube, I was able to get it in, but it was just so uncomfortable. I was rather disappointed, as fucking machines are a rather large fantasy of mine... Oh well, there are smaller attachments available online. Perhaps I'll buy one.. We'll see.

Monday, January 12, 2009

Cum shots

Sex again yesterday. I like sex. *grins* We wached the rest of the Mike Beck movie, and then continued on in the bedroom. I gave him a blow job while he fucked me with his fingers, and I got really close to coming just from that. Then I got on top and we fucked until we'd both orgasmed.

I truly enjoy giving blow jobs, even though I can't stand the cum shots in porn movies, especially those to the face. It's not that I dislike sperm, I just can't stand it in the face. If he has to come in my mouth, he comes, I swallow and that's it (though I've never much enjoyed the flavor). No messing around with it or eating it off a spoon. I just don't get why cumming on a woman's face has become such a standard way of doing things in porn. It's disgusting!

Saturday, January 10, 2009

Stop rabbiting, start rocking?

So, yeah I recieved the Rock Chick just after New Year, and tried it out for the first time a couple of days ago. Did I come twice? Yes. Is it actually hands free? Not really, at least not for me. Am I convinced this thingy is better than all other sex toys out there? No.

For now, lets say I don't actually hate it, but I'm not rocking all night long either.

Who knows though, it might grow on me.